So there's this guy.... and he kinda has my heart.
But so far as I can tell, he has no idea.

And it's the same old same old "well-i-dont-want-to-be-presumptuous-that-he-likes-me-back, so-i-guess-ill-just-wait-around-to-see-what-happens" story...
And that usually ends in whatever I have just slipping away because I'm too much a pussy ass bitch to take a chance. Easy come, easy go.

Some people tell me I should just go for it, be bold, make a move... it's not that easy. I'm stricken with low self-esteem, you see. And it blends into crippling shyness... I'm far too scared to just up and do that at this point, unless I get some pretty strong signs that he likes me back. Also, if I were to do that, and he DIDN'T like me, I would just shatter. I know, I know, the worst he can say is "no"... but then everything would change.

So for now I'm just gonna go on talking to him, hanging out with him... hoping all the while that I will somehow seem alluring to him, and maybe he will feel the same attraction that I feel. Maybe I'm just a coward... but I like to think I'm letting things grow slowly, assuming there's anything to let grow.

It's not even an issue of me not thinking I'm pretty or whatever, because I'm at a point where I think I'm alright, but I also know that not everyone will agree with me... and I'm just hoping he's not one of those people. Though I suppose if he is I don't need to be with him anyway, but... it would hurt. And I know it sounds naive and cliche, but I'm tired of being hurt. So maybe I'm not a coward; I'm just protecting myself. BUT I don't want to lose anything that might be there because I'm being too protective... Verdad?